“A tuppence, only a tuppence, to have seen the most physically hideous man who ever lived. The gain of a mere tuppence for one man gave survival to another.” It is accountings, such as this, that I have read, which compels me to tell you a story as true and as elegant as this walking stick, I carry.
There are many situations that our good Lord brings to our lives to change our perspective. Such a situation, beyond one’s imagination, came into my life. Perhaps you have once heard of Mr. John Merrick, or perhaps it is the more common association of his name that you are familiar with, the Elephant Man. It was Sir Frederick Treves, the surgeon at the London Hospital, which first introduced us. I had just returned from a missionary hospital in the Niger and was quite familiar with the many afflictions man seemed destined to endure, at least I had assumed so.
My intention at this point is not to frighten you, nor do I wish to go into much detail regarding the appearance of Mr. Merrick. For it was not the horrible condition of this man that this story is about, though some description is probably required. Mr. Merrick had been born with enlargement of the bones. His skin thickened with flaps that were loose and fungous looking. He suffered in youth from disease of the hip joint that caused permanent lameness. The most striking feature about him was his enormous and misshapen head. His face being so distorted it was incapable of expression. His situation was in every sense painful, incapacitating, and completely humiliating.
Yet, this was a man who once expressed, “I am happy every hour of the day.” How can one comprehend such words? I have written in my journal the explanations of some. “Mr. Merrick determined quite early in life to live his life with dignity, despite his circumstances.” Or another who thought, “It was the love the child received from his mother during his first few years before her passing.” Oh, I don’t doubt there is truth in these statements, nor am I surprised at anyone’s desire to give credit to the human qualities that contributed to this remarkable man.
For is this not what we attempt to do, even in ordinary circumstances?
Yet, in our attempts, we often overlook the divine, and I believe it was the divine that directed Mr. Merrick’s life. Since just a boy, every day, he read his Bible. Once a resident in our hospital, he benefited much from our chaplain and the Bishop of Bedford whose church he attended regularly. He would often thank God for the mercy provided that brought him to our hospital. It was without bitterness nor complaint, but with a quiet acceptance that Mr. Merrick lived his life.
When our own Lord lived on earth, people drew near him because of his love and words. I can’t help but wonder if Mr. Merrick perhaps thought that in living to express that same love, others might look beyond his deformity to the soul within him. For it was the soul within us that our Savior fixed his eyes upon when he died for our sins.
How often it is that we turn away from those who are different, those who do not share a similar appearance. But, my dear friends, I have learned, our appearance is nothing more than a costume the Lord has given us to wear, for God looks at the heart.
It is what God orchestrated inside Mr. Merrick’s heart that was true and far more eloquent than his walking stick he once carried, and then left to me. Perhaps you are curious why he would leave me this particular possession? I am certainly not in need of its assistance. You see, Mr. Merrick remembered that first day I made his acquaintance, the day I had fled from his room, terrified of his form. It was quite some time before I grew accustomed to looking at him and could bear to touch his outward costume. Just a small act of mercy that brought solace and tenderness to this undemanding man.
Yes, Mr. Merrick saw the lameness that was once in me just as clearly as the Lord did. He knew that this walking stick would remind me of that, not as punishment, but to benefit my life. For I now understand, it was the love of our Lord that enabled him to touch others. And it is his love through us that every unsightliness we can erase to bring acceptance and love to others.
Wow. Powerful. Thank you for the encouraging story of “living” in spite of circumstances.
His life story is amazing! Thanks for the comment.
I’d’ve loved to see your daughter perform this, as would my wife, who has a drama background. The story itself presents as extreme, as I think in terms of punctuation: more than a single exclamation mark. It takes as much to shock our understanding. We encounter this same scenarios daily or weekly. What of those who are otherwise friends, but their political or environmental or medical views aren’t acceptable, so they’re written off. Or the homeless guy who smells bad, recently released from prison, who gives you a sidelong look to see if you withdraw. Or a homeless group to whom you offer food, whose response is: we don’t care if you bring food, just come and talk to us because we’re invisible. We’re all elephant people, and all nurses. from one day to the next.
Thanks for sharing, Danny. Yes, I think to one degree or another, we are all elephant people and nurses. Though we can’t begin to comprehend or compare the level of rejection and humiliation John Merrick went through or his sufferings. I could never place any rejection I’ve ever felt next to his or to many others in this world. When I was in college I took a part-time job as an attendant for a quadriplegic man. Now and then he would want to go out to eat or to an event. One time he took me, I took him, to the Ice Capades. He told me to prepare myself for how others would be staring at us. In reality, no one stared at me, just him. That is up until they got right next to him and then they would avert their gaze. I learned a lot by watching how hard it is for people to look at someone in my friend’s condition. A simple smile and a nod would have meant so much to my friend. We have to learn to get comfortable with the uncomfortable. Because the uncomfortable is all around us, if we choose to look and respond to it.
You know I love this post. Especially at this time when costumes are all in vogue and up for debate. May we see people as God sees them – lovingly needing Jesus, for our identity is defined only by him.
Miss you, Friend.
Agree! Wish we were all better of seeing others like Jesus does. Miss you, too!
What a beautifully written dialogue and a reminder that a smile or kind greeting is free to give and can be so impactful.
Thanks, Susan, and yes it doesn’t take much to brighten a life.